Yawanawa – The birth of Vāta Txanu
Yawanawa – The birth of Vāta Txanu
My last 2 months have been beautiful, intense, wild, scary, deep. So many things have happened, that it is not easy for me to write them down. Some of the experiences were so deep, that I am still processing them. So I am just going to write down as it comes, with the intention of communicating the bigger lines of all that happened with me and the time I spend with the Yawanawa Indians in Brazil. This note will cover the first weeks in the jungle. I have started to write a book and this might become one of the chapters.
Know that many of you are in my heart, sending you all my love and blessing…
So in the beginning of November I left Pisac, my home in Peru, to go and spend time with the Yawanawa Indians, my spiritual family, to go into a 3 month long diet with a plant called “Rare Muca”. It is the most sacred plant for the Yawanawa indians. In their tradition only a few people have eaten the root of this plant during a sacred dieta, this diet was almost like a rite of passage, like an initiation in their culture. Taken by men who were on the path of being a warrior, a leader, a healer. In my last note I wrote how I met the plant, how I met the Yawanawa Indians and how I met Don Luiz, a great Maestro of the Amazon.
So there I was; in the middle of the rainforest, in a small village surrounded by sturdy small indians, coming back from the nearby village where I had bought all my food and supplies for the upcoming 3 months. Before Luiz and me went shopping, some man of the tribe had already cleared the space in the jungle and started with the construction of my jungle Casita, my house deep in the amazon, where I would be during this sacred Dieta. It was so good to be back in the village after the shopping, I never really liked shopping… It took 2 more days before I could move in. We worked hard in the jungle those days; cutting trees, clearing the ground, building the house, covering the roof with Palm leaves. The atmosphere was one with so much joy, so much happiness, so much bliss. We laughed so much those days… I hardly spoke any Portuguese in the beginning, so communication was not easy, and Luiz spoke Yawanawa to me, very persistently; if I wanted to learn from him, he would teach in Yawanawa language. Great….!
It was a big thing for them, me coming in. As it was only the 3rd village of the Yawanawa tribe that was welcoming a foreigner to do a dieta. The other 2 villages had blossomed a lot from the foreigners coming in, so the community was very grateful for me choosing to be with them. Everybody was there to help, and I was there to help everybody, that was my commitment, that was my intention.
I had decided that I would build a small centre for them, a place first for me to do a dieta, and later for other people to come there and to learn from Luiz. This would be my present to the world, to humanity, to the indigenous people, to the jungle, to the plants, and to Madre Ayahuasca, who has brought so much into my life…
A sign of gratitude for all that I have received from the jungle, a sign of gratitude to the indigenous people for keeping the knowledge alive for thousands and thousands of years. A sign of gratitude to the plants; the plants that feed us, nurture us, the plants that give us the oxygen that we breathe, the plants that teach us, heal us. A sign of gratitude to Ayahuasca, this sacred medicine that has opened my eyes, opened my mind and changed my life. She re-minded me again of why I came here, she reminded me where I come from.
So it was my intention that I was there to help the community, and hopefully every single person in the community would blossom from my stay with them. In exchange I would receive a 3 month long dieta with their most sacred plant, and Luiz would teach me about other medicine plants, and the possibility to use them in my centre; Sananda-Wasi.
I felt so happy to be there, so humble that this opportunity came into my life….
I slowly found out that Don Luiz was indeed a great Meastro. Talking to many people of the tribe and the tribes around, I learned that he knew about around 5000 – 6000 plants in the Amazon, and how to use them as a medicine. Everybody was clear on one thing: there was only 1 Luiz, in the whole area that they knew of, there was nobody else with such a knowledge of the plants; Nipui, as they call it in their language. And of course I was very happy to find that out.
In those days I was surrounded by many people; wherever I was, many people were there as well. I connected strongly with Luiz and his wife Louisa. She is such a wonderful woman… She is the Grand-Mother of the whole village; the Madrinha. Her whole house was always full of many people, many children. When she would cook, half the village would eat in her kitchen. She reminded me so much of my own Grand-Mother… It was beautiful to feel that same energy there. It was decided that Luiz went with me into the dieta together with his wife Louisa, who would take care of me, cook for me and would wash my clothes. Life in the jungle is very basic; it is about basic things like cooking, cleaning, washing clothes, building houses, that is the reality there.
Soon I found out that the whole Yawanawa tribe knew about me, and that I came to visit Luiz for a 3 month dieta. Many people wanted to join in, as before that Luiz had never taught before. They all wanted to be in… One of the oldest sons of Luiz, Edgi, decided to join me for the 3 months and also a strong, sturdy young man from a neighbour village showed up out of the blue. His name was Muca. Talking to them I found out that they wanted to join for the dieta, so that we could go through the journey together. Like that we would become the first 3 warriors of the centre. During that evening talking I received my indian name from Luiz… The Indians all have 2 names; a Portuguese name, and an Indian name in Yawanawa Language. When the questions came up, Luiz walked away for a while, and when he came back he gave me my name:
He told the story of Vāta Txanu that night for the first time. It would be one of the many stories that were told during my stay there. And when a story was told by Luiz or Louisa, both masters of story telling, many people would gather around them to listen to those ancient stories, the stories of their tradition, their culture. It were always very special moments. I have many stories recorded on my iPod, and I look forward to find somebody who can transcribe and translate them from Portugese into English.
Vāta Txanu was a leader of the Yawanawa Indians long before there was death. In those times nobody had died. They all lived eternally in the jungle, in harmony with nature, with the plants and the animals around them. They would hunt their food, they would honour the animals that they ate. They had no medicines yet, as there was no dis-ease yet. The story is much longer as I write it now, but I am going to keep it compact. Vāta Txanu told the people of his tribe that he was going to die, he would de the first Yawanawa Indian to pass away out of his body. The other people didn’t understand what he was saying, as they had never seen or heard about death. He explained them a bit, and shortly after that he died. Nobody had ever seen a death body before, that was the first corpse in the history of the Yawanawa indians. Nobody knew what to do with the body, so they laid it on the earth on a very sacred spot.
After a while, something very special happened with the body; from the heart there grew the Pepper plant, Pimiento, from the lungs there grew the tobacco plant, and from the left elbow there grew the first ayahuasca vine. There is a variety of the plant that actually looks like an elbow; it is very straight with knots at certain distances, in the Santo Daime they call that variety Caupuri Caapi. The Yawanawa called it Kunu Huni. (It is actually my most favourite vine… The Santo Daime used that vine to make medicine especially for healing; Cura). That were the first medicine plants entering into the history of the Yawanawa Indians. That was the birth of Nipui; the wisdom of the plants.
Looking me deeply in the eyes, Luiz told me that that was the name that he was giving me, that was the name of my Soul.
After the story, many people of the tribe came to talk to me, congratulated me with my new name, and would honour that name. A behaviour I saw coming back many times; we would honour each other many times, and speak about the virtues of every single person, speak about the good things they had done, how strong they were, how beautiful they were. I loved it when it happened, and coming from a very hectic world, where I was working up to 15 hours a day in the last 1,5 years it was doing me well, to just sit there, to listen to the stories, and to soak up all those beautiful words that they said to me… My heart was singing.
During those days, living in the house of Luiz and Louisa the evening were beautiful; we all ate together, everybody was in that house. I would be laying in the hammock in the living room, just soaking it all up. What I found very special to see was the way they treated their food. The man would go out into the jungle with their guns, to hunt. The Yawanawa Indians are hunters; they hunt their food. And they would use the word hunting for many things. When they found out that I had no wive, they said that we would go and hunt one for me. We would go and hunt for the plant Muca very soon, everything was about hunting for them. They asked me if I hunted. I didn’t know what to answer first, I felt into it, and after a moment o silence, I told them that I was a hunter of visions. A big smile appeared on my face, everybody smiled back. They had never met a hunter of visions before…
When the man would come bak out of the jungle the whole village was exited to see if they had caught something. It was a very simple life they led; when somebody had hunted something there was food, when there was no catch, there was no food. They lived of meat, fish, dried crackers and coffee. I hardly saw any vegetables there, hardly any fruit. It was not easy to be in that house with a mountain of food next to my hammock in boxes between people that actually know hunger.
When the man would come back with their prey, the woman and the children would take over. In the outside kitchen of Louisa, the animal was laid down. Sometimes an animal was still alive, like a turtle, or a Tatu (a small mammal, looking like a small ant-eater). Then the children would play with the animal, even for a few days. Then the animal would be prepared. One time 2 black spider monkeys arrived. Louisa put up a big pot water and when it was cooking she dipped the dead monkey in the boiling water. The children and the woman would plug of the hair (it releases really easy after the boiled water dip), till it became a completely white, bold monkey. Then it was chopped up in pieces, many people being around, the children playing with the pieces. Everybody would receive a piece to take home for dinner… The cycle of food was so pure, so direct; the source was their immediate environment, they hunted the animals with a lot of respect, according to the needs of the community. Many people of the community were involved in the preparation of the animal, the children already from a young age, saw very directly that they were eating animals. Then, most of the time, in less than a day, the meat was served and eaten. I am a vegetarian by choice, and hardly ever eat meat. There, seeing this direct circle, seeing the direct connection the indians had with their food, I decided to eat with them. In those days I ate monkeys, turtles, lizards, Tatu’s, many different kind of fishes, different eggs of several birds.
My father, who is a retired director of a school told me lately an interesting story. In one of the classes they were talking about food, talking about meat. The question was raised were meat came from. A boy answered: “Meat comes from a factory.” That resulted in a discussion, and one of the questions that was countered was: “Does meat not come from animals?” The boy was very clear; meat had nothing to do with animals, meat came from factories, where it was produce for us to be eaten. That story shocked me… In the western world people can be so dis-connected from the food that they eat. Many people in the west have no clue were the food that lays on their plates come from, which hands have all touched it, which chemicals have been added, what distance it has travelled before arriving to their plates. In the western world we have slowly lost the connection with our food. It was so deep for me to see the food being prepared right in front of my nose, it gave me much more understanding, much more gratitude for what I was eating.
Then it was slowly time to move to the jungle house. Taking a bath there was always a special moment. I would walk to the river just in front of Luiz’ house. There I would undress (keep my boxer shorts on), walk into the river with a piece of soap, get wet, come out again, soap my whole body and hair, to go in the water a last time to rinse all the soap of me. In that same river there were big water-snakes, fresh water sting rays (I ate one, very tasty!), piranhas, and many other animals… It took me a couple of days to have the trust to go fully into the water without fear. The children were always in the water, playing, swimming, fishing.
In the days before moving to the jungle house, there had been a lot of rain, resulting in a big flood. Many of the other villages were touched by the water, and some had lost everything in the floods; boats, houses, generators, everything. Sete Estrellas, the village where I was, was untouched by the float as it is quite a bit above the water line. The water came up till right in front of Luiz’ house.
The morning before starting my journey deeper into the jungle I was taking a bath. The water level was still high. I stood in the water, and a woman was sitting next to me washing cloths. I heard a sound that I had not heard before… The woman watched to the left and pointed to something in the water. Did I saw that right?… I saw a fin coming above the water, and a bit later I saw a back coming above the surface with water squirting out. Dolphins!! There were 2 amazonian river dolphins swimming just in front of me… It was such a beautiful moment for me. It felt to me as a sign, a sign of protection, a confirmation about my dieta, a sign that it was happening all in divine timing. I was jumping like a small boy, the people that saw me were laughing, we were all laughing… Right after that, I moved into my new house.
I found out quite fast that the 2 people that wanted to join me for the dieta had actually nothing to support themselves. So that meant that they would be eating my food, and living in my house. I had a long night sleep about it, if that was what I wanted, as the first intention had been to be only with Luiz and Louisa in the jungle for 3 months, without any other single person around… I dreamed about it, and saw 2 sides; the first side was that I saw that I would be such a special time, to be with 2 Yawanawa Indians going through a dieta, together on the same Journey, there would be so much support, so much sharing, so much Joy and Laughter together. But was that what I really wanted? Was that why I had come there? It occupied me quite a bit those first days… I decided to let it happen. We talked about it, as I felt a pressure on me from the outside. During one of the first evening in my house (where we were with 4 people sleeping in hammocks) we had a conversation. There I found out that many people had wanted to join me in the dieta, there even had been some fights about it who was going to join from which village. Muca, for example, had had a fight between 3 Pagers (the Brazilian name for a Shaman) as he called it, before getting there. They also told me that both Muca and Edgi would protect me, they would help me, they would be there for me in any way they could. They already made sure that no more people would join, they told everybody that there was not enough food, that there were no places to sleep. I felt so relieved in that moment… I went to my hammock, lied down and cried, feeling so much love from those people, so much support, so much protection. The first week had been very intense with many new impressions, a long Journey and slowly I started to feel the 1,5 year that was behind me. The commitment that I had carried out, all the hours that I had put in, all the things that had come to me, without taking anything back. I had put all that I had into the birth of the centre, and I had taking out nothing in return. All that time I had stood there, like a firm big tree. When there was sunshine, the birds would come and sit in my branches and sing their most beautiful songs, when there was a storm, rain, hail, wind I would just stand there, knowing that it would pass. It was there in the jungle that I felt that my body was tired, that my mind was loosing its concentration, it was time for rest…
That first cry relieved many things inside of me, I felt safe to let go, and to surrender to all that was in front of me.
That night we drank that Santo Daime that I brought for the first time… We put our hammocks on the porch of my house. I bough a mosquito net that made a kind of cage around me, while lying in the hammock. It felt like being in a palace, it was just great! I have loved hammocks already for a long time. In my first apartment where I moved in when I was 18 years old in The Hague, I hung a hammock in my living room, since then almost all my houses have had a hammock inside. To be there again in the hammock, in the middle of the amazon was amazing.
Muca and Edgi put their hammocks up, Luiz was around and 2 more people showed up. Was it not said no other people anymore?? Hmmm… One of the guys showing up was Maku, a guy from the village. He came walking in the dark with his flashlight, his guitar wearing a crown of white feathers. When I saw him appearing out of the dark, it look magical; there was an Indian with a long feather crown. WOW! Luiz watched me, and said: “Pager original” an original Shaman… I had a huge smile on my face, and told him he was welcome to join. The other boy was his cousin, that came to stay for 15 days to take flower baths that would help him to become a better hunter, it was all about hunting in the jungle, later more about that.
We sat in a circle and I opened the ceremony, it felt so naturally to do that for everyone around. Luis watched me, he didn’t drink the medicine but was present.
That first ceremony was just amazing… We had so much fun, there was so much Joy and laughter. From the first moment on, everybody was talking, noble silence was something that was not present there I learned. But they would just speak randomly, they would to just speak about anything. They would speak to each other, they would speak to me in a beautiful way: “There is Muca, the great warrior. Such a strong man, such a radiant soul, on the edge of eating the plant that carries the same name. He was called Muca, as he is so connected to that plant, to MucaNawa, the great warrior of old times that put his spirit into the plant. A strong pager, a strong leader of his village. Later he will have many wives and many children to celebrate his life.”
Or they would tell stories, stories of old, stories about the plants, stories about the animals, stories about the medicines that they were using. After an hour or so I started to sing. I took my guitar and played from the heart, it was so beautiful to be there in that hammock, in the middle of the amazon, surround by a bunch of Yawanawa Indians, one with a white feather Crown, and I started to have so much fun, to feel so much Joy, so much gratitude… One of the first songs I was singing had the following words, and when I sung them, tears were running down my cheeks, tears of gratitude, tears of grace, so many feelings were raging through my body…
“And I am so grateful for this Life
And to be serving
The Will of the One
Om Hari Om”
Those words resonated so strongly with me… The songs were guiding me all the time there. It was not easy sometimes to have nobody to speak to in a language that I speak. In that way I remembered that I was there to listen, to learn, to watch. I was not there to speak, to talk or to teach. The songs were helping me with that, really singing them like a prayer, really honouring the words of those beautiful songs..
After every song we would all shout:
We laughed so much, we laughed so much… I couldn’t stop laughing that ceremony, I was rolling in my hammock of laughter, laughing it all out. So many thing came back to me during that ceremony and the ones to follow; so many situations, so many conversations, so many actions, so many responsibilities, so many things, people, circumstances… And I laughed them all out. It was not that I was laughing at them, it was that I was laughing with them, seeing the bigger picture, seeing how we all can get caught up in our own little world… I laughed so much that first ceremony. Maku sang many songs of the Yawanawa indians, and I was soaking it all up, soaking it all up, there in my hammock in the middle of the Amazon. What a gift it was to be there…
After that first ceremony Luiz came to me and said: “Vāte Txanu, you know Huni (Ayahuasca), you know the medicine and how to work with it. Hereby I let you do all the ceremonies that come up. When you are here, you will be leading the ceremonies. You have the spirit of Ayahuasca inside of you, she speaks through you, she sings through you. I honour you for the work that you do together with her. Thank you for coming to us
That was again one of those moments were I was just soaking up the words that were spoken to me… My heart and soul were just breathing in all that came to me, breathing out all that I didn’t need anymore. The 3 others were standing around me when it happened, and they looked at me with admiration, they gave me big hugs; “You are a strong warrior” they said, “when Luiz sais something like this, it is true. You have the spirit of her inside”. And saying that they would put one of their fists in the air with force: “Strong warrior!!”
The next day we walked into the forest to look for Muca… It was a very special moment for me. There we were walking around, looking for a small plant. A plant still very unknown to the western world, they even said it has no Latin name yet, it is not classified yet. They have kept it sacred for a long time. Now slowly the plant was going into the world. WOW! There I was…
That day we didn’t find a plant. In the evening they gave me Rapé. A fine powder made from Tobacco and the bark of a tree that they call Txūnu. I already had received it before in the house of Luiz. The first time I took it, it was so strong… Luiz had chosen the dose, and Maku had blown the fine powder into my nose using an applicator made from Bones of a Black Monkey. It was blown into my nose with force. I had only taken this medicine 1 time in my life before; in the summer of 2012. After that experience I decided that I wouldn’t use the medicine again, I felt then it was for me an experience, not a medicine. I am not looking for experiences like that in my life I decided and I had never taken it again. Now I was here, and I committed to be in this diet, to be with Luiz and all that would come with it. So I took the rapé again. It hit me strong that first time… It was difficult to sit straight, so many things are happening in my body at the same time. Make was sitting right next to me, in silence. Sometime he would say something like; now put your head on your knees, or here is some toilet paper, blow your nose. After a while I had to go outside and I puked my guts out… I laid on the porch of Luiz’ house for around 3 hours, with my head of the porch, puking the hell out of me. While this all happened, the medicine was speaking to me, it humbled me, gave me understanding of what was happening. It aimed my mind, stopped the chattering, and cleaned my body in a way I had not experienced before.
In the meantime life went on in the village, everybody was walking by, as it was the most normal thing in the world to have a 2 meter tall white guy lying on the porch of a house with his head in the gutter, puking his guts out… When I saw that, in my minds eye from a distance, in the middle of those hours laying there, I laughed out loud. It was a ridiculous situation… HAHA!
I slowly got used to rapé, which they gave me every day. I puked so much those first days, but slowly I got used to it. In the village the man would take it many times a day, even the small boys. I never saw any woman take it during my stay with them, it was a medicine that belonged to Man.
Next day we walked again into the jungle. I woke up that morning finding out that there were quite some people around… Woman of the village, children… Was it not suppose to be only us during the 3 months??
During all that time a boy was with me, almost all the time. He is 12 years old, and his name is Qwatsi. I felt so much love for him, he felt so much love for me. We had so much fun together. He was one of the man that had build my house. One day I was observing all that happened there, and the questions came up if it was right that a 12 years old boy was building a house, carrying big trees on his shoulders for sometimes 20 minutes, form the place where they had cut the tree to the house. Was this child labour? What was it? At that moment a father of one of the other boys came to stand next to me, and explained: “Look at the boys, they are working, carrying the trees, building the house. Like this supporting and strengthening their bodies, so they can become strong Man later, to have a strong Body with muscles. In the jungle you need to be a strong warrior” he said, “otherwise it will be difficult to live here.”
It was so amazing that he told me that in exactly the moment I was tuning in to it. We were so connected… As I had committed to come into the tribe to learn, to watch and to live the live of a Yawanawa Indian, that meant I would not be there to judge their habits, to change their traditions, to teach them a western way of living. I reminded myself many times of that commitment, and I have kept it during my whole stay with them.
Later in the morning walking to the jungle Maku pointed a small plant out to me. We had already been walking for a few hours; in silence, looking for Muca, or Rare as it is also called. I looked at the plant, and something special happened. The plant was standing there between many other plants, still it looked like it had a circle of emptiness around it, almost if the space around it was honouring that small plant, giving it space. A beam of sunlight was shining right onto the plant. Then I felt it, this was Muca, this was the plant which potato I would eat.
Maku called Luiz to ask for confirmation. Luis came, looked at the leaves, looked under the leaves and nodded; this was Rare, this plant was for Vatā Txanu. We pulled the plant out of the ground, and there is saw 2 small potatoes growing from the roots, the size of a big grape. Around 4 centimetres in length and 2 centimetres in diameter. He looked me in the eyes, nodded and started to walk back. I felt so exited, and at the same time a deep peace was coming into my body. We arrived in my house an hour later. I prepared an altar, where I put on some sacred symbols I had with me, some beautiful stones, tiny candles that I received as a present from a dear friend before leaving. I put the Muca on it, the Santo Daime, the rapé, a picture of Guru Ram Das, an Ankh, and a small wooden angel that I had received during my Reiki Master initiation. I took another bath, dressed myself in white clothes and meditated.
This was a special moment for everybody. It was very silent. Luiz had given me the instructions before; I would take the potato, would bite the flesh of it and chew it well in my mouth. I would swallow the saliva 4 times, without swallowing the meat, only the salliva. Doing that I had to keep my face completely straight, without any expression on it. If I would pull a bad face, the dieta was going to be very difficult… You would only eat Muca 1 time in your life, not more.
I opened the ceremony, said my prayers, and felt the depth of the situation. This was the moment I had been looking forward to for such a long time, this was a moment that might be remembered for long time in my life, and most of all; I was there, in the NOW. I was completely present, fully focussed on all that was happening.
I took my Shruti and began to sing my song for Muca:
Padre de la Tierra
Ensenya me, cura me
trabalho con me, entra me
I sung the song straight for my heart, singing it like a prayer. I could feel the presence of the spirit of Muca, I could feel again the force of the universe, the source, Home… The sounds of the Shruti were radiating into the jungle, those deep indian sounds. It is a very deep sound, a very sacred sound.
Shruti is a word that comes from the Indian Vedas, one of the oldest written texts known to Humanity. They speak about the creation of the universe, the creation of the Soul, the creation of humanity. Where the Vedas come from is a deep question, and only speculation can come close to the answer. It is perhaps one of the last testament of the Ages of Intuition. The language of Veda itself is Shruti; a rhythm not composed by the intellect, but heard, like a divine word that comes vibrating out of the infinite to the inner audience of the person who is perceiving it, a person who had previously made himself fit for the impersonal knowledge. The Veda’s were not recited in the old times; they were sung. The Shruti as an instrument is an ancient reminder of those times; It is there to be used as an instrument to sing the words, the prayers into life, into being.
After the song I sat there in meditation, held the plant in my hands and took a couple of deep breaths. My heart was beating fast, my blood was running through my veins, energy was raging through my body. Then I opened my eyes; I was ready. Luiz had been at a distance. When I opened my eyes, he came to me, as if he was feeling that it was time to eat Muca, Rare. He stood in front on me, looked me deep into my eyes and asked if I was ready. I was… I felt it deep inside of me. I nodded back, repeated the instructions to be sure that I understood them right, he nodded in confirmation and then I started.
I took the first bites and let the bitter flesh of the potato come into my mouth. It was very bitter… I took it slowly, I wanted to be aware of this moment as much as I could. I had to concentrate to keep my face neutral, as the taste was inviting me to pull faces. I had a quarter of the potato in my mouth, and swallowed the saliva for the first time. Luis reminded me to have all the flesh of the potato in my mouth first and then to swallow 4 times. I put my left hand in the air, ate the potato with my right hand, chewed very slowly and then swallowed again.
I felt a deep force entering my body, very subtle at the same time very strong. A force with a depth, a beauty, a wisdom. I counted with my fingers of my left hand the times I had swallowed, and in-between I chewed the bitter flesh of the potato very thoroughly, very slow, with all my attention. After 4 times in spitted the past that was left in my mouth out, into my hands. There was a whitish paste with small pieces of the potato lying in my hands, it felt sticky.
I started to rub my fingers together gently, I blew softly into my fingers while doing it. The energies in my body felt new, I was watching them. Luiz invited me to put it all over my hands, the back of my hands, to really move it around. I started to do that, and in that process my breath became deeper and deeper. With every movement of my hands, my breath became deeper. With every contact the medicine made with my hands, my breath became deeper. I felt the energy of the medicine go into my hands. It is said that Muca gives you the energy to heal, I felt an energy I had not felt before entering my hands. With every breath I was breathing out, I blew an intention into my hands, into Muca, and out to the universe. I rubbed my hands, breathed in, took my hands towards my mouth, deeply breathing out into them, into Muca, then at the end of the breath I would raise them to the sky, releasing the intention, the prayer to the Universe.
My breath became deeper and deeper, stronger and stronger. After a while I felt a power going through my whole being, that I have not felt before. It was so strong, such a wave of energy with every breath, such a depth, such a force… When I was fully into it Luiz made some sounds of encouragement. I put many different intentions out doing it. Some of the intentions I had been planning beforehand, I even had written them down in my notebook. Most of the intentions just came in the moment, they came from deep inside of me, my core, my soul. The breath was as deep as I had hardly ever felt it before in my life, it was if the breath of life came through me at that moment, blowing the intentions from my heart, into my hands, into the Universe. Santa Musica was listening…
I started with the message of Coboclo Itumpinamba:
Health in the body
Peace in the spirit
And love in the Heart
It is this that we wish
For our beloved ones
And for all of our brothers and sisters
Then I put intentions out for my own dieta.
Intentions are very helpful with working with the Sacred Medicines, and as I see it, we are slowly learning that intentions are one of the most powerful things in life. Intentions set out the direction, the focus.
It is like being on a ship in the middle of the ocean; sometimes the ocean has big waves, a storm is coming up, the ship is going in all directions, in chaos. This can happen also in working with the sacred medicines, this can also happen in life. Then remembering your intention, can be like grabbing the steering wheel of that ship; taking command again; That is the direction I choose to go. Having a clear intention can be really helpful. In my experience it is always helpful to formulate your intention like an affirmation, wording it in a way that it is attracting what you choose, not what you don’t want to choose anymore. For example if you want to be working on releasing your depression, the intention would rather be in the direction of asking for happiness, than having an intention to let go of depression.
There I put out my intentions for my dieta, for my life, for humanity. I put out the intention of protection, the intention of guidance, wisdom, light, love, the intention to receive insights into my life, insight in certain patterns. The intention of receiving a clearer vision on the the next steps; the next steps of my life, the next steps of my centre; Sananda-Wasi. The intention to receive insights in dis-eases and how to achieve a healthy body, mind and spirit. An intention of a deeper understanding of the the uni-verse, a deeper understanding of evolution. The intention of protection for the indigenous people, the maintenance of their wisdom, their linage, the forest, the plants. The intention of receiving blessings for my parents, my family, my beloved ones, Don Luiz, all my friends and enemies. I put out the intention that the small centre I was creating there in the jungle would grow organically, supporting the maintenance of the wisdom of the Yawanawa people, helping them to create abundance. And above all I put out the intention of Abundance. There and then decided that abundance would be a major focus in my life. We all deserve abundance, and to learn how to tap into it. And with abundance I mean, to attract abundance to yourself. Not to keep it with you, just for you. No; abundance to be able to share, freely, generously with everything around. That was my main intention: Abundance.
These intentions and a couple of more deeper intentions that are difficult to put into words, I put out there while blowing my breath into my hands, into Muca, into the Universe…
When I was done I opened my eyes. It took me a while to get back, to remember where I was, what just had happened. And there I was; sitting on the porch of my house in the jungle, a house that was not completely finished yet, in a village of the Yawanawa Indians, sitting in front of a grand Meastro of the jungle; Don Luiz. I looked around me, in astonishment, and saw the plants and the trees around me in a different light, I was watching them, listening to the symphonies of their leaves. I was hearing the songs of many animals around me. I closed my eyes again, and took a couple of deep breaths…
At that moment, a deep feeling of gratitude poured in; gratitude for my life, gratitude for my body, gratitude for the plants that give me the oxygen that I breath, the plants that feed me, nurture me, heal me, teach me. Gratitude for Muca coming into my life, gratitude for the Journey that had brought me to this moment, gratitude that it manifested itself in my life, gratitude for Don Luiz. There was so much gratitude inside of me. This gratitude became grace… A feeling hard to describe in words. A feeling of beauty poured in, tears were welling up in my eyes. What a moment that was…
I opened my eyes again, and looked into the eyes of Luiz, he looked straight back. In that moment it was if time stopped. I saw him, he saw me. No words were needed. There I felt: I am, that I am.
After a while he nodded. Told me to go to my mattress and lay down for 24 hours without speaking, and with only movements that were necessary to eat and do the things that my body needed to do. I had to keep only positive thoughts, as Muca would manifest my thoughts right in front of me in this reality. For the rest of the 3 months I had to keep my mind concentrated; only thoughts that are good; thoughts that would support my future and what I wanted to see there. Only thoughts about other people that were honouring them, only thoughts of love and respect. I had to keep my words pure during my dieta; only noble speech… No telling bad things, no gossiping, no lying, no hurting other people with my words. Only words that would come from my heart, creating a vibration from the heart, a vibration of love. All that to set out, and to maintain a clear focus, to be aware of this moment, the NOW.
I nodded, went to my mattress and closed my eyes, the Journey had begun…
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